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[–]TehKitti400k Hype 1481 points1482 points  (78 children)

Fixed a bug allowing community servers to override certain game files.

They listened reddit, no more penises on your radar.

[–]AgentPaint400k Hype 1111 points1112 points  (26 children)

Great, now I have to add them in myself, thanks Valve

[–]n000gOverpass Veteran 170 points171 points  (9 children)

no more penises on your radar

But you'll still get dicks in matchmaking.

[–]Skrub_God 8 points9 points  (0 children)

But it was fun to see how community servers would mess up your DDS files.

[–]TarikLovesAnime 10 points11 points  (1 child)

FeelsBadMan. I'll be back.

[–]AgentPaint400k Hype 938 points939 points  (84 children)

Nuke

  • Performance optimizations

Fuck we're running out of shit to complain about

[–][deleted] 253 points254 points  (24 children)

Someone make a threat regarding mat_postprocess_enable 0, quick!

[–]Porkton400k Hype 197 points198 points  (17 children)

I SWEAR TO GOD VALVE IF YOU DONT LET US CHANGE mat_postprocess_enable I WONT BUY SKINS FOR 3 DAYS

is that a good enough threat for you

[–]Trooper1232Cloud9 Fan 154 points155 points  (14 children)

Threat is good, that's why NiP just beat fnatic

[–]r0bbinsOverpass Veteran 80 points81 points  (13 children)

NiP beating fnatic 2-0 in a Bo3...

WHAT YEAR IS IT

[–]DcjjVexed Gaming Fan 51 points52 points  (5 children)

2016

[–]r0bbinsOverpass Veteran 27 points28 points  (3 children)

But Internet Explorer says it's 2005??!?!?!

[–]alemone 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Thats why we use the Edge browser. You should too.

[–]EyLuisMiBR Fan 11 points12 points  (1 child)

Current year

[–]its_a_simulationENCE Fan 7 points8 points  (2 children)

The year where that happened with fnatic playing with a stand in and online.

[–]JGStonedRaiderTactics 19 points20 points  (1 child)

I use mat_postprocess_enable 9, that's like almost 10 beter

[–]StarkiecatNinjas in Pyjamas Fan 2 points3 points  (3 children)

how about func_vehicle?

[–]LUIGI2323 334 points335 points  (26 children)

U-uh... 128 tick servers! t-team matchmaking! 1 billion dollar tournaments! A CSGO pro guaranteed in every matchmaking game! FREE CSGO SKINS!

[–]lowlzmclovin 108 points109 points  (17 children)

Three of those things are not like the others...

[–]AgentPaint400k Hype 92 points93 points  (15 children)

I know, Free skins is much more important compared to the rest of this shit.

[–][deleted] 99 points100 points  (8 children)

Id pay atleast $20 for that!

[–]usev25Ninjas in Pyjamas Fan 6 points7 points  (3 children)

I already paid $20+ total on all operation coins, but I'm not getting a dragon lore ever week!!!!111 Valve pls fix

[–]ChewbackerBanner Competition #1 Winner 19 points20 points  (3 children)

Technically we get one every week.

[–]AP-TOaDFaZe Clan Fan 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Dont forget unranked matchmaking!!!1!! Everyone on reddit loves that shit!

[–]hamclammer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

L-le epic!

[–][deleted] 462 points463 points  (49 children)

Probably the new Cache.

IT'S THE NEW CACHE GET HYPED.

RIP BHOPPING CHICKENS.

Increased radius of c4 disarm sound

YES.

The new chicken message.

[–]AgentPaint400k Hype 217 points218 points  (12 children)

Holy shit they really make you feel bad about chicken murder now.

[–][deleted] 280 points281 points  (1 child)

"She was just 4 rounds away from retirement."

[–]AgentPaint400k Hype 58 points59 points  (0 children)

Valve, listen up. This man is making some great improvements to this game.

[–]b0mmieiBUYPOWER Fan 38 points39 points  (5 children)

All that's left is to display the name of the person who killed the chicken. So I can kill that bastard.

[–]AgentPaint400k Hype 12 points13 points  (4 children)

Valve needs to re-enable the suicide command for that to work

[–]StylishStuffCache Veteran 22 points23 points  (3 children)

Whenever I take over a chicken in DM I guard it as long as possible. It becomes like my child

[–]PrasunJWVirtus.Pro Fan 6 points7 points  (1 child)

i try to do that too,but usually i get killed before it

[–]topacsCloud9 Fan 4 points5 points  (0 children)

GO ON WITHOUT ME

LIVE A LONG LIFE

[–]vapenaish69 5 points6 points  (12 children)

I'm getting so much screen tearing it looks like I'm playing on splitscreen.

[–]ThePixelsRockMIBR Fan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

2 players, 4 players, or 8 man Couch Party?

[–]fanboyTWoCGenuine 500k Party Pin 231 points232 points  (22 children)

Cache

Added subtle markers for grenade throws (thanks James Bardolph)

Based Bardolph.

[–]EugenernatorFnatic Fanatic 38 points39 points  (12 children)

What are grenade markers? What did James do?

[–][deleted] 85 points86 points  (8 children)

Spots on walls to line up smokes probably. James suggested them.

[–]EugenernatorFnatic Fanatic 22 points23 points  (4 children)

Ah okay. I didn't know they were placed there intentionally. Thank you

[–]PxuLLCloud9 Fan 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Does anyone have a video for both the dots on the wall couldn't find them...

[–]KairuGuddoInMilitia Veteran 20 points21 points  (0 children)

What do they look like now?

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

[deleted]

What is this?

[–]skidd_Ninjas in Pyjamas Fan 8 points9 points  (2 children)

thank mr.bardolph

[–]PawssiblyInferno Veteran 572 points573 points  (23 children)

Alt+Tab bug fixed. OMFG, yes! PogChamp

[–]OuchiessiBUYPOWER Fan 133 points134 points  (3 children)

As per tradition a new one was likely introduced.

[–]AlyyxVirtus.Pro Fan 28 points29 points  (2 children)

don't press window keys kids

[–]ARERTSIGERNuke Veteran 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Best part!

[–]dapaca 31 points32 points  (5 children)

It says sometimes, but every time i would ever alt-tab i could hear everyone on the map shooting like they were a foot away from me.

[–]DerkleVictory 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It wasn't just alt-tab that made that sound bug and also there are different ways alt-tab can be handled on different machines. They obviously have not fixed all of the instances but fixed some.

[–]Nastye 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think it wasn't there if you tabbed back in before the next round started because it goes away with the restart of the round, so you probably just tabbed in too late every time

[–]Greenhorn24 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Halleluya!!!

[–]starvoidFnatic Fanatic 55 points56 points  (30 children)

gratz with rank up /u/wickedplayer494

[–]wickedplayer494Ninjas in Pyjamas Fan[S] 82 points83 points  (29 children)

This BenQ XL2430T is doing wonders.

[–]SinkEditsCache Veteran 19 points20 points  (0 children)

No baby, it's all you <3

[–]Newbie__101Astralis Fan 5 points6 points  (1 child)

So good it might be a legal ESEA cheat? :p

[–]wickedplayer494Ninjas in Pyjamas Fan[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

In fact, I first heard of the whole Black eQualizer thing through one of the Dallas LAN streams from S8/S9/S10!

[–]sinsmi400k Hype 171 points172 points  (25 children)

Increased radius of c4 disarm sound

Small but major change.

I like it.

[–]MagicMadDawgOpTic Gaming Fan 14 points15 points  (23 children)

Not sure about this one. It didn't really seem necessary, and I have no clue how big an impact this change will have.

[–]sinsmi400k Hype 14 points15 points  (10 children)

LOTS of [pro] clutches come down to listening for the defuse sound, and this has the potential to be heard through smokes, heard from a bigger radius, and that sort of thing.

[–]Rawzlekk 14 points15 points  (4 children)

I mean......it said it only increased the range at which you can hear the sound. I don't think they made it any louder than before so hearing it through a smoke bloom shouldn't be an issue.

[–]PparadigmGenuine 750k Party Pin 99 points100 points  (3 children)

Added CS:GO in-game blog localization for Finnish.

Easy for Ence eSports Organisation.

[–][deleted] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Suomi mainittu Torilla tavataan!

[–]EkarosENCE Fan 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I do have some weird friends who use Steam in Finnish... So I dunno, maybe there is a point...

[–]Gheiter 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Torille? Torille.

[–]NeverLetGoack 29 points30 points  (2 children)

When Valve say they fixed bomb_stuck spots. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XIfhMdIyWHY

[–]teemadejNinjas in Pyjamas Fan 15 points16 points  (1 child)

[–]onefmpMapper for Cache, Season, and others 53 points54 points  (0 children)

Woopsy :)

[–]popillilWildfire 255 points256 points  (30 children)

Performance optimizations

This

Fixed some cases where alt-tabbing away and back to the game would cause incorrect sounds to play

This

Significantly reduced holiday cheer

And This

Valve listens to us!

[–]MindmelterTeam Liquid Fan 45 points46 points  (18 children)

i dont actually know what they meant about holiday cheer,
can anyone explain?

[–]EncrestedGamingValeria 214 points215 points  (9 children)

The bhopping chickens. No more will they be going through connector like speed demons!

[–]MiniredllamaValeria 47 points48 points  (7 children)

No more doing it sideways either!

[–]SwagowiczGenuine 750k Party Pin 62 points63 points  (4 children)

Yo chicken, if you're not scripting can you give me bhop lessons? I'm fucking kidding. Its obvious.

[–]AllWoWNoShamGodsent Fan 11 points12 points  (1 child)

Chickens -sweaters Chickens -bhopping

[–]Mega_Toast400k Hype 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Bhopping chickens I presume. Not sure why anyone would be happy about such a massive gamebreaking change.

[–]StylishStuffCache Veteran 2 points3 points  (0 children)

no more hopping chickens for easter

[–]YeahMannGuardian 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Probably the chickens with easter rabbit ears, etc.

[–]Raz0rLightG2 Esports Fan 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Significantly reduced holiday cheer

I love that wording

[–]TemiOOAstralis Fan 3 points4 points  (4 children)

What's the holiday cheer thing about

[–]TheRustySSK Gaming Fan 6 points7 points  (0 children)

RIP Easter Chickens

[–]c0ffeecs 145 points146 points  (4 children)

Unplayable

imgur

[–]VENlVIDlVICliBUYPOWER Fan 34 points35 points  (0 children)

[–]DMann420 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Holy crap. What a joke! Unbelievable. BOYCOTT VOLVO!

[–]shadydeath999 21 points22 points  (0 children)

  • Fixed some cases where alt-tabbing away and back to the game would cause incorrect sounds to play

Holy crap finally I can alt-tab in peace now, thanks Volvo!

[–]MachoDaggerTeam Dignitas Fan 63 points64 points  (43 children)

[–]crazy_caliTeam Astralis Fan 40 points41 points  (5 children)

[–]magicminusMisfits Fan 37 points38 points  (1 child)

Holy shit, OSHA would throw the book at this place

[–]DMann420 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Well it's currently occupied by a group of 5 terrorists in a perpetual all out war against a group of counter-terrorists. They should probably hold off on the inspection.

[–]NickyjhaCloud9 Fan 20 points21 points  (11 children)

There used to be a large stack of red boxes on top of the blue one, right? I haven't played nuke much.

[–]unhiVox Eminor Fan 11 points12 points  (5 children)

Yeah and you could jump on to them from the railing and then on to the roof on the right.

rip :(

[–]GladossCakeTeam Astralis Fan 6 points7 points  (2 children)

You can get to the roof from the railing without the stack.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Yup, just airstrafe

[–]sjw_mods 2 points3 points  (0 children)

yes, super op imo. couldn't kill the person in garage without suicide

[–]Archer_KnightGuardian 8 points9 points  (0 children)

rip anders

[–]CaptainSkull22ENCE Fan 2 points3 points  (1 child)

whats the difference i cant tell

[–]SorcereRji 2 points3 points  (0 children)

There was a redbox on top of the blue one.

[–][deleted] 19 points20 points  (9 children)

no prime activation?? :(

[–]wickedplayer494Ninjas in Pyjamas Fan[S] 6 points7 points  (8 children)

Nope.

[–]Raionic 10 points11 points  (7 children)

Is it possible that activating prime is server side and it is already on? Just testing the community feedback with them believing it's off

[–]RebinsNinjas in Pyjamas Fan 100 points101 points  (4 children)

110mb 8 new guns 10 new knives

[–]pzCSGO5 Year Subreddit Veteran 30 points31 points  (0 children)

2 new (reworked) maps

[–]CNLSandersVictory 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Probably chickens wearing santa hats, and kill feeds with christmas decorations.

[–]Greenhorn24 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This was actually an awesome update. No new skins, but fixing things we complained about for a long time!

[–]ExplosiveLoliBaggage Veteran 43 points44 points  (0 children)

IT'S HAPPENING, VISUAL AND PERFORMANCE UPGRADES TO CACHE AND NUKE

ALT+TAB BUG FIXED

NEW INACCURACY CVARS FOR OFFLINE TESTING

WOOOOOO

[–]ctran2131Team EnVyUs Fan 80 points81 points  (11 children)

holy shit you are fast

[–]Porkton400k Hype 65 points66 points  (5 children)

thats why he can't get a date

/s

[–]eddy_v5 Year Subreddit Veteran 2 points3 points  (0 children)

First time on r/globaloffensive?

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (1 child)

nuke outside framerate more than doubled for me, I got 130 fps on an offline server without bots

[–]Dingy09OpTic Gaming Fan 7 points8 points  (0 children)

"Significantly reduced holiday cheer."

:(

[–]makeswordcloudsagain 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Here is a word cloud of every comment in this thread, as of this time: http://i.imgur.com/iIGw5Sa.png


[source code] [contact developer] [request word cloud]

[–]insinr8r 16 points17 points  (6 children)

Update May 4th

Missed opportunity for chickens in little Stormtrooper outfits.

[–][deleted] 20 points21 points  (3 children)

And a disney lawsuit. No thanks

[–]insinr8r 16 points17 points  (2 children)

We could alter them slightly and call them Stormsoldiers.

[–]yahvittu5 Year Subreddit Veteran 7 points8 points  (2 children)

Fixed some cases where alt-tabbing away and back to the game would cause incorrect sounds to play

THANK YOU GABEN

[–]drewst18Astralis Fan 6 points7 points  (0 children)

ALT TAB FIX!! PRAISE GABEN!

[–]EivisGuardian 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Death message added last update now also says: "She was yours for <x> seconds."

Personalized chicken skins inc

[–]SyzbuH400k Hype 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Please new cache

[–]DeviuzCloud9 Fan 5 points6 points  (0 children)

nuke fix PogChamp

new cache PogChamp

[–]diocletian4316Virtus.Pro Fan 14 points15 points  (5 children)

Someone left matchmaking, got a 10 minute cooldown.

[–]wickedplayer494Ninjas in Pyjamas Fan[S] 51 points52 points  (4 children)

The GC is instructed to dish out reduced cooldowns during expected periods of instability such as updates.

[–]diocletian4316Virtus.Pro Fan 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Didn't know that, thanks!

[–]assa_ 4 points5 points  (4 children)

Anyone else having lower fps on cache as before the update?

i had around 180-220 fps on cache,now im struggling with 100-140 fps

(i5 3570k, 4.2 ghz gtx 680)

[–]stichomythia 25 points26 points  (12 children)

Update during the PGL Minor :<

[–]wickedplayer494Ninjas in Pyjamas Fan[S] 35 points36 points  (4 children)

► Game is hard

[–]danielkzaMIBR Fan 8 points9 points  (4 children)

Should it be a problem when the previous branch is available?

[–]BandoMemphisSK Gaming Fan 7 points8 points  (0 children)

PLS GOD BE PRIME

[–]freshblinkTitan Fan 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Thanks for delivering, wicked!

[–]wickedplayer494Ninjas in Pyjamas Fan[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Consider it a courtesy.

[–]ZcSxCloud9 Fan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

New Cache!

[–]PooThenPee 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Performance optimizations

FeelsGoodMan

[–]AprilFoolsGoldGuardian Elite[🍰] 12 points13 points  (2 children)

110MB this is YUGE

[–]ZarnoLite10 Year Veteran 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Think of what this means for yumanity, Shepard!

Wait, wrong villain.

[–]MarbalsTeam Liquid Fan 2 points3 points  (0 children)

prime pls

[–]BiscxitsMirage Veteran 2 points3 points  (0 children)

PogChamp

[–]iKryErryTimeRenegades Fan 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Fixed pixelwalks at mid, T-Spawn, A main, A site

Can anyone show me what these were?

[–]Cryptic_AssholeVirtus.Pro Fan 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Fixed some cases where alt-tabbing away and back to the game would cause incorrect sounds to play

THANK GOD!

[–]LordQuasi4Renegades Fan 2 points3 points  (5 children)

How is everyones fps on nuke? better?

[–]kerim3211Space Soldiers Fan 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Fixed some cases where alt-tabbing away and back to the game would cause incorrect sounds to play

FINALLY

[–]gijsroge 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The video 3kliksphilip did on bots in the new nuke made it to the update :) note the point in nuke update:

  • Improved .nav mesh (thanks Bez)

Here is the video for anyone wondering.

[–]FalseEvidence 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Increased c4 sound radius PogChamp

Fixed alt tab sound bug PogChamp

[–]arleitissOverpass Veteran 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Significantly reduced holiday cheer.

Not sure why but that sounds extremely depressing.

[–]Digletto 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Can someone put together some examples of how far the c4 disarm sound travels now?

[–]AsianCowboy_ 13 points14 points  (3 children)

What we all wanted to see --> "Inferno has been added back to the active duty maps and Dust II has been moved to the reserves map pool"

[–]wickedplayer494Ninjas in Pyjamas Fan[S] 35 points36 points  (1 child)

Dust 2 getting moved to reserves would cause quite a shit storm...but I'd love it.

[–]gymnasticRugAstralis Fan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Next winter update

[–]Barclay_compLexity Fan 11 points12 points  (10 children)

There a bug thread?

Jump Crouching on Cache causes the whole screen to like "move" up with you. It's weird. Just try jump-crouching.

EDIT: Not just cache, happens on all maps, whether hosting or not.

[–]LoLzArmyDeath Sentence 5 points6 points  (1 child)

That happens on all the maps, if you host. Go on dust2 and it's gonna be the same

[–]atem_ntFaZe Clan Fan 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Can someone make a short video showcasing that bug?

[–]IceAero5 Year Subreddit Veteran 6 points7 points  (4 children)

Definitely broke something with the jump crouching visual. It's like my whole screen is vibrating when I do it.

[–]JunglebobEVirtus.Pro Fan 17 points18 points  (2 children)

lol jump crouching was always like that. It is a source engine bug where the engine try to render crouch and standing pov at the same time causing tearing. nothing new here.

[–]Encore-BIG Fan 2 points3 points  (0 children)

But for some reason I only got the bug in offline, when on a server this does not happen.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children)

You can now have your chicken minions attack!

[–]Emerzionn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fixed some cases where alt-tabbing away and back to the game would cause incorrect sounds to play

after months!! blessed holy fuck best update of the year

[–]mildlyfunnycommenter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Improved .nav mesh (thanks p_NM) This is big. Bigger than the patch notes suggest. You'll see both move more fluidly on Cache now.